Don't Buy This Stuff (4)
It’s amazing how frequently we can write a blog post about new worthless yet purchasable gadget shop tat but here we are.
Of course, this blog post isn’t just about gadgets. We throw the net wider to incorporate all manner of items that you don’t need and shouldn’t buy. As a global shipping company, we believe that holidaymakers should be made aware of the junk thrown at them as a targeted demographic - shiny junk in nice packaging, but junk nonetheless.
Skyfall was not only a terrible James Bond film, it was also a terrible film in its own right – half-baked, badly-acted, illogical, sexist, dated nonsense. What signal did that lady give to James Bond that she wanted him to join her in the shower? None. But in he went – because he’s a presumptuous old lecher. Luckily, the one saving grace of this tedious film which somehow turned Javier Bardem into an ironing board in a wig, was the presence of a really nice rifle case which has inspired this limited edition suitcase from Globe Trotter. Only £5000!
For those going on holiday with their baby son or daughter, please don’t. A baby? What’s wrong with you? What do you expect them to do? They won’t remember anything. They just want milk and sleep, not hidden excess baggage fees and hotel bar entertainment.
If you haven’t just changed your mind however, you might be interested in the Guava Family GoCrib Portable Travel Crib from The Fancy. It’s a funky, portable, lightweight tent/crib that folds into a backpack. Sounds great, of course, but anyone who’s ever erected one of these things on the beach knows that a stiff wind will take it into a bordering country before you can say 'nap time'.
You know what it’s like when you go on a camping holiday. Well, I hope you do anyway, because I don’t. I like warmth and walls and bars that serve wine, so camping isn’t my thing. But you know what it’s like when you go camping – so much equipment to carry, so much time wasted pitching the tent, so much…hmm, no I can’t think of a third thing. But anyway, if you’re plagued by these concerns, look no further than the Jakpak from Firebox – a tent, sleeping bag and mosquito net that folds into a jacket! It’s an ingenious idea, until you see the promotional pictures of a young man wrapped in what looks like an ill-fitting body bag. I know nothing about camping but even I can see the ‘tent’ in the JakPak looks like it’s been designed to accommodate half a ladybird. Only £150.
That price again. One hundred and fifty pounds. Seriously. Put it in an ISA or something. Or, if you decide you really do need to take this along with every other gadget and widget you own on holiday with you, look at an excess baggage service like ours - it'll save you a bundle on those airline fees. Really.
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