Don't Buy This Stuff (7)

15 October 2014

Excess Baggage Ideas

Yes we're back with our pick of what not to buy for your next holiday. Seven Seas Worldwide is one of the world's leading excess baggage companies with bases everywhere including in the UK, USA, Australia, China and Malaysia, so we know a thing or two about what you need for a successful journey abroad. And you don't need any of this.

First up is the Motion Sensitive Portable Travel Alarm. If you're worried about your belongings going walkabout in your hotel room, this bizarre little contraption offers peace of mind (for only 22 of your US Dollars). Simply tie it to any door knob or window handle and any unscheduled manhandling will be received with an ear-piercing woop-woop and flashing LED light. It's ideal for those who have trust issues, who don't mind setting it off accidentally (a requirement of all alarms) and are okay with buying one alarm for each door and window in their room.

Next up is the Kyjen Pet Travel Carrier. For just $60, you can carry your miniature canine around as if it were an ugly hairy baby. Your dog is envious of your dynamic lifestyle and wants to be with you all day long to share in your journey - both literal and metaphorical. The Kyjen Pet Travel Carrier provides the perfect answer to strapping your pet to your chest so that it feels like it's part of you - rather than a dog that does normal things like go for walks and take naps.

If you have enough money left over after hastily purchasing the last two options, may we introduce the Switchblade Travel Chopsticks. These certainly are the coolest-looking chopsticks we've seen. However, who wants cool chopsticks? Whoever asked for cool chopsticks? We may be a little presumptuous here but if you go to a restaurant where the food requires chopsticks, you should find chopsticks are provided. You don't need to whip out your own stainless steel ones like some sort of culinary James Bond. But hey, they're only $19.

The tagline for our next offer, the Washweiser Wash Bag, is 'take the party vibe into your bathroom'. Yes, for only £10, you can make friends think you've resorted to drinking lager in the bath. Does it get any better?

Finally for this blog, we have the iSafe Anti-Doze Detector. Priced at just under £6, this is a device you hook behind your ear that detects when you nod off at the wheel. If your head reaches a 15 degree angle, a 'gentle alarm' will sound, telling you it's time to take a break. Ideal for the next time you find yourself chatting to a social media marketing manager.